Loving the Band

Did Darren say anything about splitting up the band? Because he definitely should not have said anything about that. We swore that we would talk about it and not make anything public until we had agreed on a decision. I definitely don’t want to split up the band. I love playing in Concert Artists, making whatever music Robbie wants. It’s great that he doesn’t like to give up any creative control whatsoever, running the band as his own personal project rather than as a team effort. That’s exactly what I want in a band.

I also think that There Are Lots of Blocked Drains Near Melbourne is absolutely our best album, even if the critical and public reception was mixed. The critics and the public don’t know what they are talking about. I Have the Best Drain Camera Around Melbourne is definitely a banger of a song, and I totally don’t care what anybody else says. Since then all of our albums have been genuine masterpieces, and there’s no debating that. 

Even This Window Is Dark Now is a masterpiece, coming directly from the brilliant mind of Robbie. I cannot stress enough how little I contributed to that album. All praise and feedback should go to the frontman of the band (please stop direct messaging me on Chirp. Robbie really is the one who deserves all of your strangely worded praise).

A professional plumber told me that our second album perfectly represents drain cleaning. Melbourne residents should be informed that all research for that album was also done by Robbie, at his insistence. If you want to tell anybody about how well-researched the album was, make it him.

So in summary, I absolutely will not be leaving Concept Artists and forming a duo band with Darren. Although I must say that if we did do that, you would definitely want to check it out. I’m great on the violin and Darren is a keyboard master. I suppose if you made me choose the weakest link in the band, it would be Robbie. But I’d only say that if you made me, and never otherwise!